Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies

  • by Chris Kluwe
  • Narrated by Chris Kluwe
  • 5 hrs and 1 mins
  • Unabridged Audiobook

Publisher's Summary

"Hi. In your hands, right now, you hold the culmination of thousands of years of human intelligence, ingenuity, and brilliance. Now put your goddamn phone down and pay attention to my book.
"What is in my book, you ask? (I'm really glad you asked, by the way, because now I get to tell you.)
"Time travel. Gay marriage. Sportsballing. Futuristic goggles that DO NOTHING.
"Tiny brags from my publisher, stuff like: 'This is an uproarious, uncensored take on empathy, personal responsibility, and what it means to be human.'
"Excessive brags about myself: 'An extraordinarily clever, punishingly funny, sharp-tongued blogosphere star, NFL player, husband and father, one-time violin prodigy, voracious lifetime reader, obsessive gamer, and fearless champion of personal freedom.'
"Oh, and also an essay on the Pope's Twitter account. Honestly, if that doesn't draw you in, there's no hope left for humanity. I also give my own funeral eulogy, in case you were hoping I'd go away and die now!
"So please, join me in the glorious art of windmill tilting by reading this 'collection of rousing, uncensored personal essays, letters, and stories' (I have no idea why that's in quotes).
"Join the herd of Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies.
"(You know you want to.)"


What the Critics Say

"The most interesting man in the N.F.L." (The New York Times)
"In a league (and sports climate) which has become one, long, repetitive sound bite, a guy who will actually say something meaningful." (
"Chris Kluwe is a glimmering sparklepony of candor (and not afraid to dive fearlessly into the marriage equality debate)." (Mother Jones)


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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful

The best book I've listened to!

Would you listen to Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies again? Why?

I will definitely listen to this book again. I cannot believe this guy is a sportsman and not a professional writer .. His book and his narration is mesmerising! He has my full attention 100% of the time, his topics are interesting, his delivery is precise and comical. I would totally recommend this book to anyone!

Who was your favorite character and why?

Chris Klewe. He's the only one in it.

Which scene did you most enjoy?

It's excellent all of the way through ..

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

And more

Any additional comments?

Yes! If anyone can suggest a better book about life/science/human behaviour it will be my next purchase from Audible. I have listened to a lot of audiobooks and the only 1 which comes close to this is The Psychopath test by John Ronson :-)

Read full review

- Gavin

Book Details

  • Release Date: 25-06-2013
  • Publisher: Hachette Audio