The Last Testament

  • by David Javerbaum (contributor)
  • Narrated by David Javerbaum
  • 9 hrs and 26 mins
  • Unabridged Audiobook

Publisher's Summary

Over the course of his long and distinguished career, God has literally seen it all. And not just seen. In fact, the multi-talented deity has played a pivotal role in many major events, including the Creation of the universe, the entirety of world history, the life of every human being who has ever lived, and the successful transitioning of American Idol into the post-Simon Cowell era.
Now, as the earth he has godded so magnificently draws to a Mayan-induced close, God breaks his 1,400-year literary silence with his final masterpiece, The Last Testament.
As dictated to his mortal amanuensis, 11-time Emmy Award-winning comedy writer David Javerbaum, God looks back with unprecedented candor on his time in the public sector. He takes us behind the scenes of Genesis, setting the record (un)straight on the real first couple, Adam and Steve, and challenging long-held notions about the viability of containing a phylogenetically complete double bestiary within a 450,000-cubic-cubit watercraft.
For the first time, he breaks his silence on Jesus Christ, shedding light on a father-son relationship as heartwarming as Will and Jaden Smith’s. And he reveals his true feelings about his third great faith, Islam, WHICH ARE NOTHING BUT POSITIVE AND RESPECTFUL.
But The Last Testament doesn’t just look back. It also offers God’s perspectives on the perennial quagmires of love, marriage, and smiting. And he takes an 27.99 unfiltered look at contemporary society, addressing such hot-button topics as:

Why he loves America
What he listens for in a good prayer
Which sports teams he really roots for
Which celebrities are totally gay
Sometimes preachy, sometimes holier-than-thou, but always lively, The Last Testament is a tale of courage, adversity, and triumph. It’s the ultimate celebrity autobiography, sure to appeal to not only hardcore God fans and "worshipers", but to anyone who’s ever had total omnipotence. If you place complete faith in the literal truth of one book written by God, make it The Last Testament.


What the Critics Say

"Damned comical. Amen." (Kirkus)


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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful

Good God it's funny!

Where does The Last Testament rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

This is one of the funniest audible books I've listened to.

What did you like best about this story?

I think it was touching when God realised that up he had a defect in his personality and wrath management issues.

Which scene did you most enjoy?

It's funny from the get go and I doesn't let up.

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

Verily, yes.

Any additional comments?

Thou shouldst definitely give it a go.

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- Antonia Roberts

good fun for the unreligiously engaged

This book starts from a highly amusing premise: that God is complicated and for some reason wants to lay out his own case although, since he is the Lord thy God, question him at you peril!
Mirthing, smiting and all kinds of revelations ensue but, just one word of warning: if you have a strong religious conviction this probably isn't for you.
If, on the other hand you are having doubts about faith it may well crystallise some of those concerns through the vehicle of comedy.
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- Nigel Bax

Book Details

  • Release Date: 01-11-2011
  • Publisher: Simon & Schuster Audio